Mari90, 34

Atheist looking for friends I tend to keep everyone at a safe distance where if I die it wouldn't hurt them as much, well compared to being closer.
I guess I've lost too many people in my life and it hurts so I decided to take the easy way and just shy away from friendships. That being said I typically warm up to people but I always hold back. I can make "friends" fairly easy but I do find it hard to start conversations with people.
Ive always had a hard time being social but over the years I've made improvements though I've had plenty of set backs, I don't want to give up on finding a friend I can be completely honest with. And I don't want to regret not saying what I truly meant or felt about someone. I just need someone I can confide in who will confide in me.
I lost my best friend to suicide recently and I never got to tell him how much he truly meant to me and I regret that everyday.
Being an atheist I accept the fact that he's really dead, on the other hand it's extremely hard to accept that I will never see or talk to him again.
I understand that life goes on and I want to change my flaws to not only help myself but others and to be a better person in this world.
I will remember the goodtimes and continue his legacy by learning more about this world and being a better friend to others.